Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Randomize
