we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
