I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
