omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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