tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Randomize
