and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize