all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
