you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize
