so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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