I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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