She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
