I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
