It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
