There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
