it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
