everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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