i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
MIDGETS
????
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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