He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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