Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize