The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
