i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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