You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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