Hey man sorry I got all grabby
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I wish i was in the wii world.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
