I wanna passion pit in your ass
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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