Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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