Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I love black thongs
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
