and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
