thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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