im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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