and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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