I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
