he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
