I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
