her vagine was all disorganized.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
