I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize