she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
