Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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