why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
