No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
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