I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
