That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You may now shotgun with the bride
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
