so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
