he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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