I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
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