Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
