So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
