....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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