Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize