problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
