i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
And the cops told us we were all naked.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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