i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Randomize
